Who’s the big winner in all the recent NFL trade insanity — Peyton Manning to Broncos, Tim Tebow to Mark Sanchez’s Jets. Manning? No. Tebow? No. Sanchez? Certainly not.
So who’s the big winner? WE’RE THE BIG WINNER, PEOPLE! Yes, we get to watch Sanchez and Tebow fight it out for quarterback playing time, ideally naked and oiled up (all hail the start of the Tebow-Sanchez slash-fiction golden age!). Failing that best-case scenario, we are no doubt in for a cute photo shoot of the two of them together. Clothed. Probably in full uniform and pads. Whatever. We’ll take it!
But the other big pay-off for us? More Eric Decker. MUCH MORE Eric Decker. (Some of you watch football and know what I’m talking about. You can skip the next paragraph.)
Eric Decker and Tim Tebow were on the same team (Broncos). Eric catches balls. Tim doesn’t throw them. Eric got so little action that, during one game, his girlfriend was forced to tweet something along the lines of “Throw the damn ball!” (Sing it, sister!) Now the trades went down. Tim’s gone from Eric’s team; Peyton’s on it. Peyton is AWESOME at throwing balls. You following?
More playing time for Eric Decker means more camera time for Eric Decker. More opportunity for him to excel means an increased chance of more magazine spreads like this one from the November 2010 issue of GQ:
WE WIN!! WE WIN!!